Thankful Thursday

Sometimes I look at my kids.  Really gaze at them while they are in imaginary play or doing something and I try to will my eyes to see their future.  I look intently for what they might be like as adults, what they will look like, what they will like and not like, what majors in college or life paths they will choose.  I try to imagine them making their life choices and what will I think of those choices or what will it be like to see them get married and build families of their own.  I am always filled with such a love for them as nothing else will elicit.  I am thankful to be their mom.

Lyman still holds my hand.  I don't mean when I ask him to, when we are walking in a parking lot.  But he still reaches for my hand when we are sitting near each other on the couch or when he comes early in the morning to snuggle into Dad's place in bed after he has vacated it for work.  He reaches all the way across the king bed to my side searching for my hand to hold.  I am figuratively holding my breath for the day he decides it is icky, gross or simply not cool to hold his mom's hand.  I don't want that day to come but I know it will someday.  For now though I will hold his hand and selfishly eat up these moments I still have with him.  I am thankful he hasn't learned yet that holding hands with your mom isn't cool.

Ruby loves her family.  Her delight in seeing one of them come into the room is delicious.  Nothing provokes the kind of mirth and delighted smiles as when her family comes near her.  It is unique to her among my kids and seeing her happiness makes me certain her place in this family has been long awaited.  She is sensitive to when we are separated (Dad on business etc) and she is out of sorts until he comes home.  She likes her family together and seems only fully contented when it is so.  Her eyes seem older than her physical age with a look that says she understands more than she should for 8 months.  She is eager for her body to catch up and loves to show us her satisfaction when she pulls herself up to stand at our knees.  I wonder at how our lives were before she came.  I am thankful she did.