Jacket Hysteria

Sometimes I seriously want to throw my hands up and scream like a crazy person into the sky.  This crazy person in me usually comes out in the mornings around 8:10 am when Lyman needs to be outside for the bus in 5 minutes.  The crazy person just doesn't understand why it takes 10 or more requests to get jackets and shoes on, backpacks packed and attitudes gone. 

Today the crazy person came out when 10 minutes before this crazy person's wonderful oldest offspring needs to leave for the bus she asked him to find his jacket so that it was ready when he needed to go.  Five minutes later this crazy person sees said offspring playing lightsabor fight with himself  - the jacket is nowhere in sight.  Crazy person reminds offspring she asked him to go do something.  Offspring doesn't remember what was asked.  Crazy person with clinched jaw repeats request - biting tongue when expletives would like to be released (not really - crazy person doesn't curse but sometimes really wants to!).    Offspring runs around looking for his favorite jacket - gray zip up hoodie.  The jacket is nowhere to be found and time is up.  Crazy person gives him another jacket (essentially same thing - but pullover no zipper and red).  Offspring breaks into hysteria over how he doesn't like that jacket.  Crazy person can see the future and the future does not make her happy as it entails her having to get three kids and her own disheveled self into a car to drive offspring to school when he misses the bus over stupid jacket fashion preferences.  It is not recommended for crazy people to drive cars anyway.

Crazy person throws her hands up in the hair and groans at the ceiling.  Crazy person marches right up to offspring, puts red jacket on, explains that if he had been looking when she asked him to at first he may have had time to find cooler grey jacket and putting offspring's backpack in his hands pushes him out the door.  Crazy person thinks about locking door behind him.  Crazy person instead goes to sit by window to watch that he gets on the bus.  One minute later bus picks up offspring with backpack worn backwards to hide the offensive red jacket and while he still is protesting wildly about having to wear it.  Crazy person wonders if she is a mean mom.  Crazy person sits down on computer to blog so that she can transform back into normal person.