Dear Children

Dear Children,

Today has not been a very easy day for your Mom. We had very little we had to do but it still was a bit too much for me and this pregnancy. I know that you both have so much fun playing with each other and that makes me happy but its hard on me when I have to tell you both to not drive the shopping cart into the sides of the aisle and that knocking down the displays is not funny. I know that its a lot more fun to hide under the clothing displays and shake them til they almost fall over but I would prefer it if next time you would please just hold on to the cart while I pick out yet another swimsuit for you Corilynn because the other is lost. I also know that now that we have such a bigger space to live than we used to it is a lot more fun to run all over the house to play but when I ask you to stay in the living room with me so that I can lay down for a minute so that I don't throw up lunch - please don't go into the kitchen and pour water all over the floor instead.

Thank you Corilynn for being the type of child that when you get in trouble and are disciplined want to be held and cuddled while you get over the emotions. A lot of times it is hard for me when I am upset with you to want to cuddle you while you work over your feelings on my neck but I am grateful for how it softens my frustrated heart to have to hug you when I am upset with you.

Thank you Lyman for wanting to hold my hand while we both try to take a nap even though your four year old body has such a difficult time staying still for a while that I feel like I am on the end of the whip chain being pulled back and forth in the bed and it makes it impossible for me to fall asleep. I am thankful to be holding your hand because when you do fall asleep I am there to see it and to get to hold your now still hand.

I know it has been hard on the both of you with this pregnancy. I am not the same mother I am when I am not pregnant. I know that I have less patience for you both and that I cant get up to play with you as much as we used to. I know you have a lot more of the same lunches over and over and that sometimes I cant sit with you while you eat because I cant be around the food you are having. Please forgive me while I spend a little time trying out this relationship with your new brother or sister. I know in a few years you will be grateful for the new addition to play with but for now I know it is hard on you. I am still your Mom and I still love you both.

Sincerely and most lovingly,

Your Mommy

PS Thanks for stepping on those cracks all threw the parking lot and "breaking your mommy's back" so many times. It was funny for me to see you laugh after I would fake injury after injury.

Updated 3 hrs later:

P.P.S Corilynn please do not take off your diaper before you fall asleep for your nap because when you wake up and pee and poop all over the bed and your own naked body and then I have to give you a bath and clean your bed it makes Mommy get to the point where I have to laugh not because I think its funny but beacuse I am out of tears today. I love you but please keep the diaper on. I am going out to dinner now. I deserve it.